Flatus

I came across this passage while studying today. I thought it very funny and descriptive. I realize that not everyone will agree with me, but I still wanted to share. I hope that you can at least get a chuckle from this...

From The Merck Manual, 16th edition:

Flatulence: Among those who are flatulent, the quantity and frequency of gas passage shows great variability. As with bowel frequency, persons who complain of flatulence often have a misconception of what is normal. In a study of 8 normal men aged 25 to 35 yr, the average number of gas passages was 13 ± 4 in one day with an upper limit of 21/day, which overlapped with many persons who complained of excess flatus. On the other hand, one study noted a person who expelled gas as often as 141 times daily, including 70 passages in one 4-hour period. Hence, objectively recording flatus frequency should be the first step in evaluating a complaint of excessive flatulence.

This symptom, which can cause great psychosocial distress, is unofficially described according to its salient characteristics:
· The "slider" (crowded elevator type), which is released slowly and noiselessly, sometimes with devastating effect;
· The open sphincter, or "pooh" type, which is said to be of higher temperature and more aromatic;
· The staccato or drumbeat type, pleasantly passed in privacy; and
· The "bark" type (described in a personal communication), characterized by a sharp exclamatory eruption that effectively interrupts (and often concludes) conversation. Aromaticity is not a prominent feature.

Rarely, this usually distressing symptom has been turned to advantage, as with a Frenchman referred to as "Le Petomane," who became affluent as an effluent performer who played tunes with the gas from his rectum on the Moulin Rouge stage. Despite the flammable nature of flatal H2 and CH4, no hazard is likely to those working near open flames, and youngsters have even been known to make a game of expelling gas over a match flame. However, gas explosion, rarely with fatal outcome, has been reported during jejunal and colonic surgery, and even during proctosigmoidoscopic procedures, where diathermy was used.